Saturday, January 22, 2011

Question of the week.

Lately, I've been so caught up in life....that I haven't been reading my favorite blogs, nor have I been writing from my journal or my wee thoughts.
Life seems to be flashing past me like the traffic on route 28. without a traffic jam that is
A conversation I had recently with an acquaintance triggered this post.

Three questions..... one answer? I couldn't do it. I'm not good at giving short answers and I certainly can not tell you a story without every single detail. I set the the point where you may even be able to smell, taste, see and hear! so I've been told

1. What makes you happy?

*Happiness {happy - adjective} having a sense of satisfaction/standard of: Happy with his performance.
Well, I could rattle off plenty of things that make me happy. {loving husband, healthy children,loving family members, warm home to live in, food, car, job!, my friends, my.......}
But what she was asking is what truly makes me happy.
My life. The life I was given. Would I and could I be happy without the above? If something should happen to my husband, my children, my family, my job, could I continue to live happily? Well, loaded question. Am I able to answer truthfully I ask myself. We only have 55 minutes left on the clock and I so want to finish my peanut butter sandwich! The Jeopardy tune plays in my mind....... Yes. Would I be heartbroken, would I be torn and confused, would I be angry at God and feel the selfishness of loss? YES. Would my life continue? YES.
I'm learning. I'm maturing in His Word. I find myself not thinking of a tragic moment in my life. Yet I know it's at the tip of our fingers. He can place us in the most tragic of situations -or not. I'm not in control which took me years to learn. Am I saying that I can handle anything thrown my way? Never ever- ever would I say this. I can't. I'll look for the nearest exit sign or take the alleyway just to escape the thought of loss. The {un}happy place we humans never place ourselves. The black zone we dare not visit. I've been there and blamed everyone including God. I refused to return.
Now...back to the question. The word happiness to me is overused. Way too much thought goes into What Makes Us Happy and not enough goes into what can we do to make someone else happy. What action can I do today to create happiness in the physical act. Why not a smile? Why not opening the door for the mother of 4? Why not allowing someone to step in line ahead of you?
Those small acts can and will put a smile on YOUR face. If the other person does not thank you, or shouldn't matter. It made me feel good to do it. Especially when my children are with me. They see their parents positive role in our not so positive society.

#2. So, what you are saying is that no material thing would make you happier? allowing me to eat and enjoy my brown bag lunch!!

Happier? MMmm....... maybe more door holding?! She laughed, but it was forced.
I stressed that heading out to purchase a car and not having a car payment would be great- but wouldn't make my life happier. I stressed to this young {much younger than I} woman that having a new pair of those cute Prada sneakers for work would be cool- but would not make me happier. I stressed having all 3 of my kids receive full college scholarships would be awesome- but not make my life happier. Higher pay wouldn't hurt- but certainly will not make me super duper happy and my life complete.

#3. Are you making this up?

Perhaps there is a learning experience in this question. At one time in my life, I too wanted to ride on the Happy Train. Travel, cool apartment in NYC, handsome prince, awesome sports car, $$$.....if all else fails eat chocolate. Well, I did get my handsome prince...... but it took years to get where I am today. Mountains to climb and wild roller coaster rides to endure.
My early post talk about that. As I listen to others speak of what makes them happy- what they need in their lives- what they could not endure.....I think back to my past. Before I had regret. And even though I would remove a few years from my life's journey to tweak them.....I certainly can say with all honesty that I have remained happy. Sadness crept into my life, pain and heart ache. Death and loneliness.
In pursuit of happiness.....we, our society takes large chunks of stuff to create happiness in our lives. We forget what is important. We lose perspective. We just don't bother thinking of anything outside of our own box.
Football Superstar has an Egyptian barber. He is a Christian. His stories are so awesome to hear and his life's journey is an amazing one. Hanni is young. He is married with 2 children.
He works hard and works long hours in this metropolitan shop. He always has a smile on his face. As my husband puts it- Hanni is one happy guy!

Life Lesson: Question #4. Why is Hanni so happy?


Saturday, January 8, 2011

Been Thinking....

I've been doing a lot of thinking.....during work.....while in the car......while loading the dishwasher and even while falling asleep. I would think by now, my think tank would be empty. My mind has become a wondering wonderland. The questions that pop up in my wondering wonderland are of all sizes and shapes. can you tell I'm teaching preschoolers?
Speaking of my mind questions them as well. My main responsibility for these darlings is to be giving them a safe environment as well as a consistent and harmonious environment to walk into every morning. Am I able to do so? Yes. Am I able to reward, remind, hug, correct, and hand out large doses of TLC? Yes. My question is the boundaries. Where does the boundary line in my classroom meet the home stretch where these children live. Okay, I'm confusing you I'm sure. My classroom rules are nothing out of the ordinary. I ask they use their "walking feet". No running. Sharing is caring. Hands to ourselves. Putting items back after each use. Pretty basic stuff I think. I've had parents hand over information to me lately regarding their child that makes my head spin. I just hope as they are speaking to me, my eyes are not as large as they seem to be.
My question is this; could this be a generation thing, or am I just thinking I was too strict with my own children? Okay, I'll answer this question for you. NO I am not too strict with my own children it MUST be a generation thing. I have always wondered why parents complain about their children after the fact they have the damage done. Why would anyone permit their four year old to remain awake as everyone else in the house is sleeping. What is that child doing alone for several hours until he falls asleep? Oh, silly me....he's watching TV in his room or playing with his favorite video game, or cell phone. Yes, cell phone. Texting? I can't get texting down to a science yet- what is this four year old doing?! Who is he texting? I know Diego doesn't have a texting plan, he is too busy saving animals.
Moving on to the teens. I also have questions popping into my wonderland about teens today. What truly makes them happy. Once again, I am not saying my children are the perfect images of 4, 15 & 16 year olds. The are not. I repeat they are not! laughing
They are however learning the boundaries. The rise and fall of success. Where it comes from what is truly is. Some of their friends have everything. Everything from the newest car to the $700 cell phone. From plastic money to wads of $100's just to go to Pot Belly. Of course I don't have the wads of $100's to go into Pot Belly just to order a deli sandwich and Coke, and I certainly do not have the $700 cell phone. But these kids do....we see it every day. I see it as I take China Doll to school activities or into Starbucks to meet her friends before they head over to the ice rink. Freckle Boy has a friend show up in a 2011 Jetta. While our kids get an allowance to participate in these outings with friends.....I question it as well. We are trying very hard to help our children understand the importance of money. Hard earned money or inherited money, it's all the same. You eventually need it for something other than a latte or Hollister jeans. You'll need it in many areas for your life. Yet money will not make you truly happy. I see teens becoming absorbed with monetary gifts.....allowing people to "buy" their love through gifts. Our teens see this and they know the differences, yet it is so tempting for them when this does occur.
China Doll had a conversation with her Uncle D* the other morning regarding this economy.
She's getting it. I'm glad. She is seeing the other side. And I should say not all of her comrades are drowning in the "I want, I want" pool. Most of her friends are just like her. They look awesome in their trendy clothes, and they do have the cell phone that isn't something Grandma Ice Cream or Pop Pop would use.....but they get it. They appreciate what they are receiving, even though it may come with small print. Our small print for them is to remember the importance of what life is truly about. What is the true focus here. Is it Hollister or Verizon? Is it Diego or Guitar Hero?
Adults. This post is getting longer than I wanted. Now that I am back in the work field, I am surrounded by many, many personalities as well as cultures. It's cool. I'm enjoying my new friends from Russia, El Salvador and DC Metro!
Yet some of the surroundings are not always positive as we know. I'm not expecting Utopia, I'm an adult, I know what is out here in our world. But it will continue to amaze me on what we do to each other and to ourselves. Ignorance is bliss..... no it isn't.
I love the song "My own little world" by Matthew West. The lyrics speak with enormous power of what our society walks to. Population Me.
I won't continue rambling on about us adults. You know it as well as I do. I've read some very awesome post lately from my blogging sisters. And you know I love you all! Your words of encouragement and pure honesty means so much to me. So, with that said....thank you for reading my wondering wonders.

Life Lessons: Not to worry about the wonders.